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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
...that is, specifically, this fairly new [to me] social custom we seem to have known as the "guy hug". It is now apparently okay for men to hug one another in public.:eek: Doing so with only one arm is the way most guys are doing this; I guess that somehow makes it more "manly". Call me old-fashioned or whatever else you wish to call me, but the only other males I will hug, in private or public, are my 2 sons, or my brother. All others get a traditional, manly handshake! Furthermore, I also will not hug any woman, EXCEPT for my wife, my mom, or my sisters. For me, otherwise hugging another woman is disrespectful to my wife, and our marriage. Now, keep in mind, this is just me I'm talking about here; I'm not saying that everyone should do as I do. These are just some of the rules that I govern myself by. Anyway:Your thoughts?
 

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Yea, I don't hug guys. I have been known to get sweaty and stinky, so I've always assumed that other guys do too. Yuck.
 

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I especially hate when someone's hand slides down my back and gives me a bun squeeze.[/QUOTE

I had a woman do that to me in an elevator years ago... where I worked.
It freaked me out. I didn't quite know what to say or do... just moved to the other side of the elevator.

Later on I found out that she was a serial butt squeezer. :eek:
 

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i'm kind of non-touchy feely warm fuzzy overall-- i'll only hug guys who are either my father or my closest friends who i consider like brothers, and then it's that combo handshake hug thing. actually, i'm fairly close to some of my cousins but we don't do the hug thing, just the handshake.

as far as women, single women friends sure, not a "hitting on" thing, just a gesture. woman culture is so different than guy culture. i think a lot of the women i know would actually be offended if you hadn't seen them in a long time and they went in for the hug and you/i only extended your/my hand. as far as my married female friends and/or wives of my guy friends, i go with what they seem comfortable with.

manners need to be adaptable to meet the situation and cultural norms. i'm hidebound about certain things, but i know i have to give in a little to stay within norms and not make a situation more awkward rather than less awkward. i still hold doors for women, not because they can't but because it's polite and what my father taught me. i've never actually had a negative reaction to that, though i know some here and also on facebook have, but i'll keep doing it. the preponderance of women still find it polite and courtly. i gave my suit coat to my girlfriend at a college graduation gathering because it was cold and a mutual friend of ours said "i wish i had a boyfriend who'd do that" and she was a rabid feminist.
at the end of the day, all manners boil down to what maintain respect for self and others and also makes others feel at ease, whether we're talking guy hugs or holding the door.
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
i'm kind of non-touchy feely warm fuzzy overall-- i'll only hug guys who are either my father or my closest friends who i consider like brothers, and then it's that combo handshake hug thing. actually, i'm fairly close to some of my cousins but we don't do the hug thing, just the handshake.

as far as women, single women friends sure, not a "hitting on" thing, just a gesture. woman culture is so different than guy culture. i think a lot of the women i know would actually be offended if you hadn't seen them in a long time and they went in for the hug and you/i only extended your/my hand. as far as my married female friends and/or wives of my guy friends, i go with what they seem comfortable with.

manners need to be adaptable to meet the situation and cultural norms. i'm hidebound about certain things, but i know i have to give in a little to stay within norms and not make a situation more awkward rather than less awkward. i still hold doors for women, not because they can't but because it's polite and what my father taught me. i've never actually had a negative reaction to that, though i know some here and also on facebook have, but i'll keep doing it. the preponderance of women still find it polite and courtly. i gave my suit coat to my girlfriend at a college graduation gathering because it was cold and a mutual friend of ours said "i wish i had a boyfriend who'd do that" and she was a rabid feminist.
at the end of the day, all manners boil down to what maintain respect for self and others and also makes others feel at ease, whether we're talking guy hugs or holding the door.
To that, I respond with this thread I posted a while back. I think you and I are on the same sheet of music.

Over the last few years, I've noticed a disturbing trend: The near-total disappearance of manners. It seems that hardly anyone says "please", "thank you", "sir", or "ma'am" anymore. Seeing someone cover their mouth when yawning in public also seems to have gone by the wayside. Ditto for men holding the door open for ladies, or giving up their seat on a crowded bus or train for one. The men at the table rising to their feet as a lady arrives to be seated? Forget it. A man pulling out the chair at the table for a lady as she sits? No way! Don't even get me started on the prevalence of profanity. The F-word is now so common in everyday conversation, it hardly raises an eyebrow anymore. When I was growing up, most of us guys were conscientious about how we dressed; we wanted to look good for the girls. Nowadays, too many young men seem to be competing to see who can dress the sloppiest...and many young girls seem to think that the more scuzzy a guy looks, the better! When did being polite go out of style? Why does my attitude on this subject make me "old fashioned"? I'm giving my all to teach my sons this lesson: There is a HUGE difference.... between men vs. gentlemen, as well as women vs. ladies. If this makes me "old fashioned" or "out of touch"...SO BE IT.
___
 

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I try to have some sense of Chivalry and respect. Really the only men I really hug is my dad or my god father (Scares me how fragile life is after losing family to cancer in the last year. Don't care what anyone thinks because I'd miss these two people the most if anything ever happened.) I really don't do the same to any guy friends I mean a hand shake will suffice. As for women.. Heck I don't mind if they hug me, but I'm not really the guy to initiate that kind of thing.

There is nothing wrong with having some values NCL. People kind of laugh because I'm old fashioned (Im only 24 though.) it's just the way my grandfather raised me. I really do loathe my generations for making me look bad by association.

The term nice guys finish last describes why some women go for scuzzballs. They just haven't grown up mentally yet.


Also... Free Hugs anyone? XD Couldn't resist though.
 

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Well the bike gang I ride with hug. It is out of respect for each other and our lifestyle. Plus, I am sure we are charged up with enough testosterone to ward off any sissies.
I ride and know what you are talking about with bikers.
We hug our "brothers". No way it's a sissy thing.
 

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Its all part of the gay agenda:rolleyes: they want to soften you up to get your vote. That or its their way of seein who's packin.:eek: :D
 

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Discussion Starter · #14 ·
I ride and know what you are talking about with bikers.
We hug our "brothers". No way it's a sissy thing.
...and if ever I happen to see a bunch of bikers hugging each other, I do believe I'll keep my mouth shut and just keep on my merry way.....;)
 

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I don't have a problem with hugging, it's quite acceptable here.
Nothing sissy or unmanly about it.
Australians are not afraid to show genuine emotion.
We have European friends come to visit and we visit them.
It's always a hug and a European kiss, regardless of gender.
Get in touch with your "inner emotions"..... :D
 

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Discussion Starter · #17 ·
I don't have a problem with hugging, it's quite acceptable here.
Nothing sissy or unmanly about it.
Australians are not afraid to show genuine emotion.
We have European friends come to visit and we visit them.
It's always a hug and a European kiss, regardless of gender.
Get in touch with your "inner emotions"..... :D
Well, like I said in the OP, I'm only referring to myself; to each their own, and all of that. Do as you like, of course. I, personally, will remain the same on this topic...guy hugs are for immediate family only, and only the wife, mom, & the sisters get embraced!
 

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I ride and know what you are talking about with bikers.
We hug our "brothers". No way it's a sissy thing.
Yep. Many in our group formed their brotherhood in the military and since most of us don't fit in with regular society folks, we have carried that brotherhood on our patch.

We flew colors in the military now we fly our colors in the wind.
 

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Nothing wrong with a guy greeting hug, just NO touching below the waist!!
 
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