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I'm almost 70 and the Armed Forces thinks I'm too old to track down terrorists. You can't be older than 42 to join the military. They've got the whole thing backwards.

Instead of sending 18-year-olds off to fight, they ought to take us old farts. You shouldn't be able to join a military unit until you're at least 35.

For starters, researchers say 18-year-olds think about sex every ten seconds. Old guys only think about sex a couple of times a month, leaving us more than 280,000 additional seconds per day to concentrate on the enemy.

Young guys haven't lived long enough to be cranky, and a cranky soldier is a dangerous soldier. "My back hurts! I can't sleep. I'm tired and hungry." We're bad-tempered and impatient, and maybe letting us kill some analport that desperately deserves it will make us feel better and shut us up for a while.

An 18-year-old doesn't even like to get up before 10am. Old guys always get up early to pee, so what the heck. Besides, like I said, I'm tired and can't sleep and since I'm already up, I may as well be up killing some fanatical son-of-a-witch.

If captured, we couldn't spill the beans, because we'd forget where we put them. In fact, name, rank and serial number would be a real brainteaser.

Boot camp would be easier for old farts. We're used to getting screamed and yelled at and we're used to soft food. We've also developed an appreciation for firearms. We've been using them for years as an excuse to get out of the house, away from the screaming and yelling.

They could lighten up on the obstacle course however. I've been in combat and never saw a single 20-foot wall with rope hanging over the side, nor did I ever do any push-ups after completing basic training.

Actually, the running part is kind of a waste of energy, too. I've never seen anyone outrun a bullet.

An 18-year-old has the whole world ahead of him. He's still learning to shave or to start a conversation with a pretty girl. He still hasn't figured out that a baseball cap has a brim to shade his eyes, not the back of his head.

These are all great reasons to keep our kids at home to learn a little more about life before sending them off into harm's way.

Let us old farts track down those terrorists. The last thing an enemy would want to see is a couple million, hacked-off old farts with bad attitudes and semi-automatic weapons, who know that their best years are already behind them.

Hey! How about recruiting women over 50 ... in menopause! You think men have attitudes? Oh, my goodness! If nothing else, put them on border patrol. They'll have it secured the first night!
 

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I dunno..at 50 I figure some DI screaming at me is mostly gonna get laughed at...

But us old guys would give our all on the front protecting those 18 year old kids...sons and grandsons...daughters and granddaughters...and hey we certainly are more clever than those kids..right? Our aim will be more true even if we can't move as swiftly.. :D
 

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Good idea! After sleeping on the ground for a couple of nights, I'd be ready to kill some terrorists and I wouldn't much care if I died doing it, since that would mean my back would stop hurting.

I don't know about anyone else, but I'm a lot less worried about dying now than I was when I was 18. Granted, a lot of 18-year-olds think that they're immortal, but once that notion gets kicked out of their heads (say, by having a friend killed or experiencing a near-death moment), they take death too seriously.

Jim
 

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Spellign Bee Champ
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:D
 

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I've had this conversation many times with my brother and my friends who are vets. Put us somewhere were can can get them in our sights. We can't run and wouldn't if we could, so we would just shoot the crap out of 'em till they were no longer coming or we ran out of ammo. Either way it is a working solution.
 

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I am an old fart and I wholeheartedly agree. Sign me up! After Paris we'll soon enough be fighting them in our own streets. The Old Farts Brigade would be a force to reckon with. Just gimme back my E-5 rank and I'm good to go. LOL
 

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I'm 79 and love to shoot. If I had a free ride and free targets, I would be a happy camper. Love to go if I could be home every night. I would not go where I have been, but I could go somewhere.:D
 

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Life is good
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After thinking about it for a while, it would probably be a good strategy. :D
 

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I got a feeling they will be coming down the streets pretty soon they just don't wear a uniform and you can't tell a good one from a bad one. But I will do what I can to eliminate"m I'm 64 5/8 got rhematism-bad back -teeth hurt-got IBS I'm ready to kill something
 

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I would re-enlist.
 

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Ausmerican.
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Always.....
 

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I did not appreciate the military when I was a member in my younger days (think Viet Nam). Now, it sounds much better.

I think MrJimRoger is right, some over-inflated DI (TIs in the AF) yelling at us would get a pat on the head and an understanding chuckle.

I had some recruiters as students, they did not understand when I said I wanted to get back in.
 

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Great idea! Would make a wager that there would be no objection from the 18 year old generation and support from everybody else 'cept my wife. Everything I suggest is wrong according to her, good excuse to get out of the house.
 

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I dunno..at 50 I figure some DI screaming at me is mostly gonna get laughed at...

But us old guys would give our all on the front protecting those 18 year old kids...sons and grandsons...daughters and granddaughters...and hey we certainly are more clever than those kids..right? Our aim will be more true even if we can't move as swiftly.. :D
Lol. Yeah, I would not handle some DI in my face anymore. Besides, my aim would be more true BECAUSE I can't move as swiftly! ;)
 

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I am an old fart and I wholeheartedly agree. Sign me up! After Paris we'll soon enough be fighting them in our own streets. The Old Farts Brigade would be a force to reckon with. Just gimme back my E-5 rank and I'm good to go. LOL
The only difference,I would want my rank back and my .300 magnum with a more powerful scope, my Mini 14 and enough ammo.
I might also need a cane!
As I have said elsewhere, "I'm too old to be nice."
 

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Old medic here. I'm with you boys.
Just gimme a well stocked deuce-n-a-half (medical supplies).
We'll drive all to hell - just like a cattle drive.

Probably have to kill a few isis to get 'em started, but that's OK too.
 
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