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I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me.

How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America?

A good friend will come and bail you out of jail...but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Wow...that was fun!"

I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just go "chunky dunking.”

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over?

Why is it that our children can't read a Bible in school, but they can in prison?

Wouldn't you know it...brain cells come and brain cells go, but FAT cells live forever!

Why do I have to swear on the Bible in court when the Ten Commandments cannot be displayed outside?

And remember: Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes...so have fun, think "good thoughts" only, learn to laugh at yourself, and "Count your blessings"!!!!!!!
 

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"How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for Miss America"

rman, I just can't help pondering who would want to watch 50 AHs parading around a stage??:D
 

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quote:Originally posted by btrumanj

rman, I just can't help pondering who would want to watch 50 AHs parading around a stage??:D
You know...you got a real good point there!
 
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